"At least we tried to make it."
- Tapes N Tapes "The Iliad"
This entry has been hard for me to get up the motivation to write. Everything here is fail. I completely hate the psychos I live with. Outback never called me back. I'm out of money. I'm stuck out in the middle of nowhere without a car. Basically everything that could go wrong has gone wrong.
I hate failing. I really wanted to make a go of it here, but I just don't think it's in the cards for me right now. With the economy and everything, it's even more difficult than it would be normally. So, I find myself heading back to Seattle. In ignominy. It's been two weeks. Didn't even get to 10 blog entries. It's just all been worst case scenario.
Going back to Seattle will be good though, I think. I've gained alot of knowledge and understanding from being down there. Even though I couldn't cut it down here right now, I still feel just as dedicated to screenwriting as I did when I arrived. That hasn't waivered.
I really just want to save up, get a car, and then I feel like I'll have alot more flexibility in the urban sprawl that is LA. It's all certianly an uphill battle, but I feel like that will go along way into making it manageable.
I want to write another play. About what I'm not quite sure yet, although I have some ideas. I just feel like it's been really on my mind recently, and would be a good thing to write, that I can actually see reach it's fruition, unlike the movie scripts that sit on my hard drive.
I want to write more TV. Brian seems all about the Sitcom Pilots right now. That could all change tomorrow, but it's something that I enjoy and feel like I could do successfully, so I'm going to write more episodes of Wet City Wash, and try my hands at a couple other Pilots.
And I want to finish Is This Thing On? I've had more ideas about that recently, and I feel like it's starting to come along.
All in all, I feel insipired, energized, and reinvigorated, and I want to really buckle down and focus on what's important to me and get things done.
Jai Ho!
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ReplyDeleteI think you'll be fine. I think it was a good experience for you, and you just have to think of it as such. Now you know what to do next time so you can kick ass and you can know better how to plan and how to be prepared.
ReplyDeleteKeep working on your scripts and remember to keep your "fans" updated on the progress, particularly on Is This Thing On (which I have not seen in a long time!) and White City Wash (which I just love) :)
You'll be great. And you can't start using Jai Ho! because I've already copyrighted that for usage on my Twitter.
Sending you good luck vibes. Hope I didn't get you "in trouble".
I happy to hear that this hasn´t detered you from your goals. Big hug from me :)
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